Thursday, July 20, 2017

A Pre-dinner Toast Professional College and University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
Be at Ease School of Etiquette Austin
At a banquet, Military Dining-out or Dining-in, and at other official functions each person can be asked to stand behind his or her chair for a toast or some other pre-dinner ceremony.
1.People at the table may be asked to charge or to fill their glass.
Note: Some get the toast out of the way at the beginning so that the photographers can go home.
2. When clicking glasses, to honor someone, the junior person is to click a glass rim lower than that of a senior person. To each toast there can be just a mock clicking to the air.
3. After a toast, each man is to pull out the chair for the woman to his right, see that she is seated, and help her set her chair in place. This man is then to pull out his chair and take his seat; sit to avoid from showing a gap between the top of the socks and the bottom of the trousers; avoid playing footsie, and keep his feet on the floor.
Sample Toasts
A host is to have a repertoire of classic toasts, just in case eloquence eludes him. Avoid offering a toast or participating in one during the playing of any national anthem.
The first toast can be (to someone who is not here) “To the President” Then
1. To Health and Wealth
“May you live long as you want. And have all that you want as long as you live.”
2. To Happiness or well being
“May your neighbors respect you, trouble neglect you, angels, protect you, and Heaven accept you (let you in.)”
3. To Friendship
There are good ships, and wood ships, that sail in every sea. But the best ships are friendships. This you have taught to me.”

Rules for Handling Cocktail Foods Professional College & University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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The line to the bar can lead to cocktail foods. Cocktail foods require the use of a cocktail napkin, a napkin and a toothpick, or a napkin, toothpick, and a small plate.
1. The plate is to be held in the left hand placed on top of the index finger and held in place by the tip of the left thumb. The napkin can be held under the plate folded in half, between the index and the middle fingers or the middle and ring fingers. Learn how to survive a business party: how to hold a napkin, glass, and a plate, in your left hand, functionally: a glass can be balanced in the palm and held with the ring and pinky fingers. The right hand is to be used to eat with, drink with, and to make corrections required with the napkin. Each food item is to be brought to the edge of the napkin or plate closest you even in mock form before being placed in your mouth.
2. Cocktail foods: canapés, hors d'oeuvres, or nuts are to be served away from the table and are to be eaten with the fingers. A vegetable strip or a chip can be snapped in half and each may be dipped once. When a meat & cheese tray is used each item can be rolled up and eaten. The cheese item alone may be rolled up and eaten. It could be broken off and eaten one piece at a time. These actions might save you from trying to make a cocktail sandwich with one hand.
3. A hors d'oeuvre that is even slightly messy can be picked up using at minimum a toothpick. When no longer required it is to be placed on the left side of the plate, under it, or on a napkin. It can be set down in a wastebasket or ashtray. The plate, toothpick, and/or napkin are to be left in the area where each was served. Avoid setting a used plate, toothpick or napkin on an in-use buffet table.
__________

In Informal Service, a Starch Item and a Vegetable Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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In informal service, a starch item and can be served with a vegetable. Corn on the cob as a side dish is to be eaten while being held with the fingers of the left and right hand. Avoid using those pins to stick into each end of the cob. A meat knife can be used to dress corn: add butter, pepper, and salt. It is then set in the rest position for it.
1. The cob is to be taken to the mouth and the corn eaten a few rows at a time.
2. The dressing process can be repeated for the rest of the dish.
3. At a formal meal, another item can replace each listed dish. A baked potato is to be eaten using a knife and fork. The knife is to be held in the right hand and used to make an incision lengthwise and crosswise. Then it is placed in the rest position for it. Note: A clean fork, not a butter spreader, is to be used to place butter into a baked potato and onto other vegetables. Add butter to vegetables only if you wish to let the hostess know that a less than adequate job was done in the kitchen. Serving dishes and implements can be used to add sour cream and chives to a baked potato. Then the fork is used to separate and eat the meat from the inside of the potato or to eat the skin right along with the potato. A fork and knife can be used to cut the potato into manageable bites one or two pieces at a time. Risotto is be eaten by using a fork or a spoon to push the grains of cooked rice out slightly toward the edge of the bowl, then eating only from the pulled out ring. The course is continued by spreading from the center and eating around the edges in a circle. This will keep it hot – in theory. In a commercial dining room only, a vegetable item could be served in a side cup. It might be eaten from this dish. It has been seen transferred to a main course plate and eaten from it. Omit from using a side cup in a private home.


Special Ways to Say Thank You Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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Special Ways to Say Thank You. When you were the guest of honor,
1. You can send flowers with a card to say, "Thank you" and that you, "Had a wonderful time." “So and so and I enjoyed ourselves at dinner last night" and "We both thank you very much." When an event was a joint guest-spouse one, the note is to be written, and any present sent, by the spouse.
2. When you are paying for meal, in a commercial dining room, you can say thank you to a server verbally and by leaving a tip. Be careful about eating in places where tipping seems to be mandatory (coffee shops,) prohibited, or optional. When you advance to eating in upscale dining rooms, the servers will not understand. Here, the server is taxed on a percent of your bill. It can cost her or him to serve you.
The tip is to be minimum 15% of the total bill minus tax. An increased tip can be provided for exceptional service. When a host says, “I got that.” The reply is to be, “Thank you.” (This is the  second part of the first half of saying thank you.
The second part of the second half here spoken or unspoken is to remember, “Come again,” or reciprocity.

Station Seven – The Line to Go - Things to Take a Way Professional College and University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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The event host or hostess is to be able to decide how take a-ways are to be handled. In a private home, the hostess may say
1. "Please take some of this with you." The serving dish containing the leftover is to be returned to the area in which it was prepared. Each person is to be given a filled plate that he or she may keep forever.
2. In a commercial dining room, the host or hostess can request that each person be allowed to take an unfinished portion of a meal home. This action may be requested quietly and discreetly. It could be accomplished in the same fashion. The "Go" plate or container is to be filled in the area in which the dish was prepared and placed to the left of the person who requested it. It can be set aside so that it may be picked up on the line to good-bye.
The go plate or container could be brought into the dining room and filled in the Russian service style: with the fork and spoon in one hand. It might be filled Family style: with each person being asked to fill his or her own go plate. Both of these methods are observations more than recommendations.
3. A “To go” bag is to go with a requested “to go” container: it is a nice touch: a paper bag is a neat option.
In business dining and at a banquet, the line to the leftovers is usually omitted. Food is to be eaten or not in place. In business, avoid asking for or accepting invitations to take food home.
4. The take-way can be a party favor, a memento to take home: a menu card (have it signed,) a photograph, and a small present or newly acquired information: sales pitch – training – contacts.

Avoid CSI Drinking Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
Be at Ease School of Etiquette Austin
Avoid CSI drinking. There is no need to five finger mug or a glass.  If you go missing they should not get all of your finger prints from one glass. Learn three-finger drinking by glass base or stem. Under a roof, avoid swigging from a bottle next to someone drinking from a glass. Avoid drinking from a straw under a roof, out of a glass, or from a beverage not contained in a container. 
When a pre-dinner drink is rested it can be carried on the palm of the left hand. The right hand is to be kept warm, free, and dry as much as possible, practice.
When a drink is finished, it is to be placed back on a bar, or on a tray set up to receive it. At a table, the cocktail napkin and the glass are to be taken away from the place setting position in which it was set.   
The number of pre-dinner drinks to have is two; one drink helps make for good conversation with you. More than two drinks makes for great conversation for someone else about you. All pre-dinner drinks can be “Virgin:” Have one.
Appear to be drinking less than the host, hostess, or person who is picking up the tap. At an evening event, make any drink Virgin (especially after your first.)
“Never get drunk before your boss does. Never get drunk before your co-worker does. Never let other employees hear your singing voice. Apply the rule of one glass of soda and a twist for every drink. No touching.”  No drinking on the way to station four: the line to the table.
And wash your hands before you come to or stay at a table. Now, curl your fingers towards you, look at your nails. If you are going to drink with someone, do your nails or have them done. 








Eating Crème Brulee Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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Crème brulee is to be eaten by using a ramekin, an underlying plate set in a place setting, and a spoon.
1. The cup can be steadied with the left hand. The side of the spoon is used to tap or to crack the sugar crust shell.
2. The top shell is pushed into the crème.
3. The dish to be eaten by being spooned from the shell and placed into the mouth.
When garnished with berries (and kiwi) each is to be eaten with a spoon.
4. The finished position for the spoon is to the right side of the cup atop the underlying plate.

Butter in Business Dining Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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Butter is to be served in a butter crock set on a table without an underlying plate. It is one of three items allowed to be placed directly on a table that is not a glass or a plate.
A butter knife (with a point) is to be used to serve butter to a plate. Then the knife is to be placed across the top of the crock.
Casually, butter can be transferred to a B&B plate using a butter spreader (with a rounded top.)
In informal service, each person can take butter from the serving dish with his or her butter spreader. A butter spreader is to be used only for the dressing of breads. It can be rested across the top of a bread and butter plate, blade parallel with the edge of the table or handle at four o'clock. It may be placed with the handle pointed to one o’clock. (Few do this.) Casually, butter can be spread onto bread with a clean place knife. Commercially, butter can be pre-set at each setting; bread may be served already buttered.
At a formal meal, butter is to be omitted, as well as the bread and butter plate, and the butter spreader.

Rules for a Toast and Using a Finger Bowl Professional College & University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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A host or hostess may plan for and prepare a toast to the health, wealth, or well being of the event or honoree. In a private home, the toast is to be proposed by a host near the end of the dessert course. A guest can propose a toast during this course if approved/justified and if one has been omitted by a host. At an official dinner, a toast is to be proposed by a member of a Dais. The first toast is to be made
1. To someone who is present at the event only in spirit.
2. The second toast can be proposed to the senior person or to the guest of honor: an honoring toast. The toast to other individuals may follow as coordinated and approved of by the host and the hostess.
3. When clicking glasses, to honor someone, the junior person is to click a glass rim lower than that of a senior person.
4. The response to a toast is to be, "To the (whoever)" or "Here, here." Then a drink is taken of the beverage provided.
5. A person is to abstain for toasting with water. The person being honored is to abstain from drinking to him or herself. A guest of honor may stand and offer a reciprocal toast.

Have and Use Personal and Business Cards Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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Above the age of eighteen, a person is to use small cards to present himself or herself, officially, unofficially, as a representative of a business, organization, profession, government, or home.
Practice using business cards.  After your elevator introduction, be prepared to receive cards. When asked, “Do you have a card?” Be able to say,” Here is my card.” Expect one to be provided in kind. Have cards with you to give in kind: give a visiting card or a business card for the same.
At a minimum, have a business or organizational visiting card. It is to list your logo at the top left, and your first and last name, without your title, center (or just above center) the card. It can list your telephone number in the bottom right hand corner. It may list your email address in a smaller point size, above the telephone number. For more social events, the logo might then be omitted. It can list your major designation, or an allegiance logo or website at the top right. It may list it at the bottom right, above the telephone number. You can personalize any card you give using a fountain pen, or a pencil.
Practice using personal correspondence cards. There are old school rules for the design, format, and use of these cards, especially for men. They can be especially useful for Thank you notes.

Station Two - The Reception Line Professional College & University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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The reception line starts behind the front door. It is where people invited to an event can be made comfortable and introduced to someone else. Socially, a women or senior person is to be lead into this area. Here, help any woman with you to take off her coat. Check it if asked. Check any other items such as an umbrella, package, briefcase, coat, and/or hat.
The reception line can lead to hired help who will say, "May I have your “card,” “ticket,” “Invitation,” or "This way please."
The reception line may lead to a table set up so that a present may be placed on it. (You can have at home a closet from which you may select and provide a proper present, where required.) Note people give presents; gifts come from another source.

Chicken Manners How to Eat Chicken Bone-in with a Knife and Fork Professional & University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach 512 821-2699
Be at Ease School of Etiquette Austin
The rule, when chicken is to be eaten under a roof, it is to be eaten with a knife and fork. It is no longer a finger food. Even the Colonel provides plates, knives, and forks, and Staff will ask, “Will this be “To go” or for our dining room?” The company knows the rule. After you are asked, what you do with that box or bucket reflects on you.
1. Establish a cover: a place setting for one. Serve your plate. Practice your "Chicken manners."
2. The portion to be eaten is to be placed in the "work" bottom area of the plate. You’ve seen the pictures. The skin can be removed by the fork being used to hold the item in place, and the knife being used to cut the end of it. Then it may be used to gently roll the skin back toward the back of the fork. The skin could be set aside to the right to be eaten later or to the left to be discarded.
3. The chicken piece is to be impaled with the fork held in the left hand and cut: pressed from the middle of the knife in the right, and then a small piece can be flicked gently away. More delicately now, the meat is to be sliced with the grain and cut across it into manageable portions one or two pieces at a time. Then the fork is used to lift each portion to the mouth.
4. Chicken joined by a joint can be separated by the fork being used to hold the item in place and the knife at the joint being pressed down to feel the join, then drawn backwards, and pressed to cut the item into separate parts. It can be pressed down and gently flicked towards the fork to complete the joint separation. Then pieces might be cut, sliced, and eaten. The part of the chicken that cannot be pressed, flicked away, and sliced with a knife and fork is simply left, at least ‘til you get to the kitchen.
__________

Small poultry items can be eaten as much as practical with a knife and fork and then finished with the fingers. When served cold, at picnics, at the beach, on boats, and during very informal meals outside, even chicken may be eaten with the fingers.
Welcome to your Business Etiquette Dinner. Most likely the main course will be a half of a (rubber) chicken or a whole Cornish game hen. Now, are not you happy you practiced?

Advanced Formal Place Setting Professional & University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach 512 821-2699
Be at Ease School of Etiquette Austin

In advanced “formal” place setting, typically, left to right flatware can consist of a fish or appetizer fork, a place (or meat) fork, salad fork, or a dessert fork. This fork may be place above a plate, handle pointed to the left. A dessert spoon may be placed above it or in lieu of it handle pointed to the right. Then to the right side of the plate there can be a salad knife, a place (or meat) knife, a fish or appetizer knife, a soupspoon, and an oyster cocktail fork. It can be placed to the left of other forks. Each course is to get its own glass (except salad) and flatware placed in order of use outside in “in kind.” (Place the all forks, knives and then the one spoon).The rule is understood to mean the coffee spoon is omitted from the place setting. It can be brought in when coffee is served. “Eat from the outside in,” is understood to mean either a dessert spoon is not required, is set above the plate space, or will be brought in when the course is served. Set all forks, knives, and then all spoons. And know the rule of four: of the five glasses allowed, no more than four are to be set in any place setting at any one time.  The sherry glass can be omitted. Then when the table is set to a menu, "Go from the outside in." In a formal place setting, butter is to be omitted from the menuAt a table, avoid making personal items: books or technology apart of a cover.


 


Station One - The Meeting Line Professional College & University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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The meeting line begins from thirty feet out and ends at the front door. It is where you meet people or assemble before calling on the event host or hostess or a commercial host. It is here, that someone from the inside can get a first glimpse at you.
1. Be punctual. Arrive, “Just in time,” whatever this means in your community. You can get there early and wait in the car, or take a walk around the block.
2. In a commercial dining establishment, open the door for any person with you. Give each revolving door a push. Step back. Let each senior person (regardless of gender) enter the door before you do.
3. Remember, it is the right of a host to enter a doorway (or elevator) last. Know when to hold to your position and when to give up the fight.
The Line to Presents in Business Dining
Occasionally show up with a present. A guest is to take a present to the hostess of any event where he or she did not have to work or pay to attend.
The present is to be carried by the senior male guest when in tandem and is to be given to the hostess (when there is one.) Avoid the expecting receiver always being able to say, "Here he comes again, one hand just as long as the other.”
Presents can be excepted at events where you had to pay to attend, when you are there to do work, and when you are a single male, or you are young. Avoid pushing the latter two rules. A table for presents can be excepted.


Eating Lobster Professional & Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101


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by Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
Be at Ease School of Etiquette Austin
Lobster served as a main course is to be eaten with a plate, the
fingers, an oyster cocktail fork, and a bib for each person to be provided one.
2. The meat in the pocket of the body is to be extracted using an oyster cocktail fork.
3. It can be cut, dipped in a sauce and then placed in the mouth. The lobster  (green) or the roe (red) is to be lifted out of the body and placed to the left side of the plate. The roe (red) can be eaten.
4. The lobster tail is to be held in the left hand and detached from the body held firmly in the right hand. The meat is to be removed by breaking off the little flaps at the small end and then inserting the oyster cocktail fork in this end and pushing the meat out of the large end.
5. The tail can be split prior to the time it is brought to the table. Then the meat is to be lifted out of the shell in one piece using a fork. In either case, the meat can be cut into manageable portions one or two pieces at a time.
6. Each piece of lobster may be dipped in the attending sauce and then placed in the mouth.


Note: Again, some people cannot or will not eat Lobster. After receiving the main course, you can begin to eat bread.



Stations and Lines Professional College & University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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There are eight stations and lines for each dining event. Every
phase of each event must be done by going through one. Only what is in each station, and who has to go through each line can change. This way please.
Station One
The Meeting Line The Line to Presents
Station Two
The Reception Line Rules for
Name Badge Placement
Station Three 
The Line to the Bar
Handling Cocktail Foods
Station Four
The Line to the Table
Menu USA Number of Courses
Advanced Formal Place Setting
Station Five              
The Line to the Foods
Order of Service
Station Six                
The Line to the Bathroom
Repairs & Checks
Station Seven
The Line “To Go” Things to Take-a-way
Station Eight -        
The Line to Goodbye
Saying Thank you
Correspondence Cards with matching envelopes and Forever stamps & Reciprocity



Overcoming Coffee Shop Habits & Dining Hall Ways Professional & Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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When ordering coffee in a star coffee shop or café, get a cup “for here;” a ceramic cup is usually available with a saucer, for the asking. Ok, get a mug, even a mug has much more panache than a paper fiber and the industry standard liner (low-density polyethylene plastic) glass and a sleeve, (a cup has a handle), with a lid under a roof, held near the top, or a metal container with a lid on it: an adult Sippy-cup. In a hotel shop, get French Press.
An espresso for here is to come in a ceramic demitasse cup with a demitasse saucer. To the rest of the world this is a coffee.  Learn how to hold a demitasse cup: it is to be held by pinching the handle placed between the thumb, index, and middle fingers. The rest and finished position for the cup is atop the saucer handle to four o’clock.
Learn how to hold a coffee mug or teacup: each is to be held with the index finger though the handle. The thumb is placed above the handle, and the middle finger placed below it. All fingers are to follow the curve of the ring finger. “Handle” for a reason. Use it. The cup is to be picked up and taken to the mouth to drink from it. No blowing and no tongue.  The elbow is to remain down and in. The rest and finished position for the cup is atop the saucer handle to four o’clock. Learn how to walk and hold a saucer with a cup with one hand,with a napkin. Lift the cup using your right hand.  Pour liquid into your mouth, from your wrist.  If you get something to eat with coffee, ask for a food item "for here." You will get your item and a ceramic plate. The view you provide for someone else is worth the tax- if any. Each plate may now justify you putting a tip in that jar in clear view. For this you could carry cash. At some places tips cannot be added to tabs. Short of using a ceramic plate, in the Continental style, food has been seen eaten from atop a bag; it serving as a plate. In the America style, food has been seen being eaten from inside a bag; it is a café habit without the same grace.

Eat in the Continental Style Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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Eat in the Continental style. Keep your hands above the table. (Sit up straight. Put your back into it. Lift your neck up.
Take a hand rest often. Rest the heels of your hands on the edge of the table, without loading a food item.  Continentally, you can talk with a knife and fork in your hands. Keep them low. You can rest your elbows on the table - in between courses.
Cut items in only one direction, one or two pieces at a time. You may eat only one thing at a time.  Bring food to you. OK, stop ducking your head down to get to your food.You can load and lock the next portion at the hand rest position; your wrist is to be in contact with the edge of the table. Lift when ready.
Avoid eating too little, too much, or too fast, or acting as if the meal is to be your last. When at a loss as to how to eat a particular dish, watch the person who made or ordered it. You can ask, "How am I to eat this?" The lesson most likely will begin with a smile.
Time ingestion: time the opening of your mouth to just coincide with the arrival of the implement to it. Close your mouth around the edge of any implement placed in it. Chew each portion twenty-four times, with your mouth closed, and saver each bite. Taste buds live and digestion begins in the mouth not the stomach – yes that’s right. At the seventeenth bite experience food taste explosions. When you can no longer hear your teeth chewing food then that’s the time to swallow and to take another bite. Make as little noise as possible.


Pre-Steps in Business Dining Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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You have responded to a request to RSVP and have accepted “with pleasure the kind” invitation, and have identified any meal restrictions. You have agreed to the dress request. Yes, dress as your host expects. Dress in season. Learn business dress suit etiquette, business personal grooming, and business etiquette to know. Meet conduct expectations. Plan your transportation. Get directions. Know the name of the venue, location, and time of the meeting. Engine search the location and map directions. Get a trip planner, bus, car, and ride hailing application. Get a parking application. Learn the most favorable driving directions and parking instructions for each place to which you will invite someone. See if each parking pass can be validated by the venue.The discount for the special of the day can be overshadowed by the cost of parking or the valet. The Valet: the person who will park your car. Someone asked me about parking to which I replied, “Get a Valet key, and let a valet park your car.  It is OK, really.” If you let this happen, place what you want to keep in the glove compartment or in the trunk. Avoid tempting an angel. Tip this person one dollar-five dollars and the posted rate on the way out. This person can expect that you have already mastered the art of palming. When a valet is not present, learn if the venue will validate the parking pass. Review the on-line menu. Get fast food coupons; (eat a little something before you get there.”) Now back to stations.





Eating Salad with the Third Fork Professional College & University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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Salad served with large leaves, with cheese, or in a rocklike quarter head is to be eaten by using a knife and fork. Salad may be cut using the side of the fork. Each leaf can be picked up, or rolled back and impaled, on the tines of the fork and taken to the mouth. If the salad can be cut with the edge of the salad fork alone, the clean salad knife can remain on the table.
Each tomato can be pierced with the end tine of a fork.
 Informally salad can be served with the main course. It could be a non-green salad usually served without crackers or cheese.
Informally, salad might be served as a first course placed center the place setting, or atop a show plate. A bowl for salad has been seen set directly onto a table. When it is to be served as a first course, cheese is to be omitted. Still ordering salad before meat, take another dining class before you eat. Practice,” Salad after meat;” this is the order, even at the White House. This course can be skipped at a business dinner or on a date, in favor of a dessert. Between the salad and dessert course, visit station six, the line to the bathroom.

 

An Appetizer II Professional & Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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- An appetizer is essentially a hors d’oeouvre served at the table usually in lieu of or prior to a first course.
An amuse bouche is a bite size appetizer that might be provided by a chef at no cost to a patron. It has been seen paired with a wine. It cannot be ordered from a menu.
For some, shrimp, oysters, clams, or escargot can be served as an appetizer. The vessel for each can be set atop a show plate. The oyster cocktail fork is placed to the extreme right of the last knife or spoon. It can be placed in the bowl of the soup spoon tines-up, with the handle pointed to five o'clock. An oyster cocktail fork may be placed to the extreme left of the last fork(s.) It could be placed with up to three other forks in a place setting. It is the lone exception to the rule, "only three items of any one kind in any one place setting at a time. It can be placed to the right side of an underlying plate when a dish is served to a table. This is also the finished position for the fork.
Some guest will not and cannot have any of the above as an appetizer. Make sure there are other appetizer options. The only appetizers for a guest are those that can be eaten by each person being entertained.  

Water at Table Professional & Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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When a guest is to be at table a water glass is to be set at each setting as a sign of hospitality. When under a roof “Water for here” is to be served in a glass. The water glass is to be set to the right of the plate space above the tip of the knife.
Make an OK sign with both hands. Where you see the "d" that drink is yours. Avoid making the OK sign in public at any time. For each guest, this is their glass.
When a cold beverage is to be served in addition to water, a water glass can be used for it or a glass specifically named for the beverage to be served may be added to the right of the water glass. Stemmed glassware is for dinner.  It can be used during the day.  Stemless glassware may be used only during the day.
In a private home, each water goblet is to be filled ¾ full prior to the time people come to the table. In a commercial dining room, water is to be served, after people are seated, from the right.
In informal service, water can be provided when requested and given in a ceramic glass or a paper glass. Under a roof, avoid asking for and or using a lid or a straw. At some point, omit the sippy glass, and risk that the drink might not tip.
Before taking a drink of any beverage eating implements are to be placed in the rest position for the style in which you are eating. Pat or blot your mouth with the corner of your napkin and return it to your lap.
Remember the sign; beverages are to be taken up from the right side using the right hand. A water glass is to be picked up by the stem or the base, and with elbow down and in, taken to the mouth, and a sip (pour) of water is to be taken. The rest and finished position for the glass is in the table setting position. At a table, avoid placing a napkin under a water glass.


In a private home, the water glass can be refilled at the table, by a server, or guests from a pitcher on the table, or the hostess can offer it from a pitcher on a sideboard. In a commercial dining room, the water glass can be refilled by a server without being lifted from the table, but usually not more than twice.

Three course dinner Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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Harold Almon Etiquette Coach
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Plan on a three-course dinner: a first course, main course, and a dessert. At a social meal, you can offer to share a dessert. At a business social meal, omit doing this.
Review the menu at each place to which you will take someone. And if you wish, know the signature dish not to be missed. If you are invited to share a meal with someone, eat a little something before you leave home.
Where allowed and appropriate, to each dessert you can add or have added cookies bought during a fund raiser such as chocolate cookies with pink M & Ms in them made and purchased in support of the cure for breast cancer (Thanks Melissa.)
You may add a few chocolate covered mint cookies, or chocolate stripped coconut cookies, acquired in support of a Scout or as part of Giving Back.
A trend has developed of omitting the first and second course. Most meals consist of a fourth and a third course: a salad and a main course. The latter practice is seen often in commercial dining rooms. There a dessert is seen and had only by the very lucky.
If you are going to share a meal with someone, eat in courses over eating in piles. At minimum, plan on a two-part lunch: a first course and a main course, or a main course and a dessert. It takes a little extra time, allows for longer conversation, and builds in great memories.
Ah yes, and learn the most favorable parking instructions. See if the parking pass for your guest can be validated by the restaurant. The discount for the special of the day can be overshadowed by the cost of the valet.

Correct Coffee Shop Habits and Café Ways Professional and Graduate University Etiquette Business Dining 101

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When ordering coffee in a star coffee shop or café, get a cup “for here;” a ceramic cup is usually available with a saucer, for the asking. Ok, get a mug, even a mug has much more panache than a paper fiber and the industry standard liner (low-density polyethylene plastic) glass and a sleeve, (a cup has a handle), with a lid under a roof, held near the top, or a metal container with a lid on it: an adult Sippy-cup. In a hotel shop, get French Press.
An espresso for here is to come in a ceramic demitasse cup with a demitasse saucer. To the rest of the world this is a coffee.  Learn how to hold a demitasse cup: it is to be held by pinching the handle placed between the thumb, index, and middle fingers. The rest and finished position for the cup is atop the saucer handle to four o’clock.

Learn how to hold a coffee mug or teacup: each is to be held with the index finger though the handle. The thumb is placed above the handle, and the middle finger placed below it. All fingers are to follow the curve of the ring finger. “Handle” for a reason. Use it. The cup is to be picked up and taken to the mouth to drink from it. No blowing and no tongue.  The elbow is to remain down and in. The rest and finished position for the cup is atop the saucer handle to four o’clock. Learn how to walk and hold a saucer with a cup with one hand. Lift the cup using your right hand.  Pour liquid into your mouth, from your wrist. 

Filling a Plate Professional & Graduate University Etiquette Dining 101

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A  roasted meat ( a Roti,) fowl, or vegetable item is to be served as a third or main course. A dinner plate is to replace any show or charger plate. When the main course is served, take small portions.
1. A serving fork is to be used in conjunction with a serving spoon to pick up a main course item. The fork is to be held in the left hand tines facing up. The tines are placed under the portion. The serving spoon is to be held in the right hand bowl facing down rested on top of the item and kept there until it is placed onto the plate. When a serving dish is passed with toast beneath some food in a sauce, the toast is to be taken also.
2. The serving spoon and fork are placed in the dish from which the food item was taken: fork tines up handle to the left, spoon placed bowl down over the tines, handles placed side by side.
3. A lone serving fork can be used to pick up a main course item. It is to be held in the right hand tines facing up resting between the thumb and the index finger and held by the thumb being rested approximately midway on the face of the handle. The fork is placed under the item, lifted, and steadied as the item is placed onto the plate. It is then placed tines up handle to the left on the dish or platter from which the item was taken.